THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY...BUT CAME BACK...

 THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY...BUT CAME BACK

So if you ask anyone, well almost anyone, there's ALWAYS the one that got away.  Not saying you're pining for that person or willing to risk your current situation for a "what-if".  But yet they are there.  

You got away.  All the late night conversations.  All the ups...all the downs and everything in between, you were always there.  Through messy relationships, failed marriages, through kids and the everyday ills of life...you were there.  Subtly.  Every so often you would pop up to let me know you were alive.  Or how the little one was doing.  We would talk about work or our latest situations...which in my case there were more than naught. We've spent holidays together, we've laughed on one coast of the country to the other.  And my family and friends have always adored you. But you got away...

You know my darkest secrets and never judged me.  Sure I know I might have disappointed you with the decisions I've made or the paths I've chosen, but you were always there.  Wondering what the fuck was wrong with me and why couldn't I just be normal..  I remember the first time our paths crossed.  I knew at that moment our lives would forever be connected.  And in some regards they always have been.  3 Stacks said he always knew you'd come back around...Lynette and Jazzy always ask about you...but you got away...

Most recently I've gone through arguably the darkest time in my life.  A time where everything is so uncertain.  I lost A LOT in the process and ultimately I had to re-evaluate the very core of who I am or was.  I was sitting out back watching the fire sway to the breeze...or maybe it was the Jill Scott baseline, sipping some bubbly...and the phone rang.  How did you know? Was the universe sending you my very own Bat signal and you just happened to look up at the sky and *poof* you're on the roof with Jim Gordon?

My soul was instantly eased.  And everything in my dark world all of a sudden was bright.  Your words were thoughtful, but brutally honest.  It wasn't just bullshit I wanted to hear, but words I needed to hear.  From someone I trusted.  Someone I have always believed in, because if the situation were reversed I would be going at your head just the same.  It was one of the best conversations I have had in a long while.  And I left feeling renewed.  Like everything was gonna be ok.  I felt that...but you got away.

Recently I was with 3 Stacks and we were just talking about relationships and how funny life can be sometimes and he randomly brought your name up.  About how dope you are or how down you've been from day one...and before he could finish his thoughts, I found my left hand swyping across the Samsung. I might have sent you 6 paragraphs and devised a plan.  I waited in agony for a reply.  Wait did I just fuck my friendship up?  Now this shit is going to be very awkward right.  After several minutes you replied with... "that's actually a good idea! But I have a question of my own?"

Still unsure as to what was happening I immediately responded "GO!"

Her question?  "What took you so long?"

In life it's rare to find someone to truly love you for you.  Good, bad and all the bullshit in between.  I thought I found true love once.  And I lost that...and parts of me thought I would never survive that.  But in truth, you were the one I was made for.  Looking back through history the signs were ALWAYS there.  I had to go through my bullshit in order to see what was always set before me.  I find myself on my hands and knees praying throughout my life for a bestfriend to walk through this life with and God has been sending you my way for over a decade.  That's crazy to even think about.  Ironically the "Un-thinkable" remix just came on as I type this ode to the one that got away.  How true are those lyrics?  WOW!  Signs.  "If you're with me I'm ready." 

The one that got away became the one that came back.  And I've got a nagging suspicion that this time she's not leaving.  And I'm SOOOOOOO ok with that.  In life you can go from extreme highs to extreme lows.  Having someone who truly understands who you are, what you have been through makes the difficult days not so much difficult.  

From the most random of encounters to over a decade of unyielding friendship, you got away.  Then life saw fit to bring you back...for good!

~The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Brian Sevier~